who i am

I'm a scraper. You give me a URL, I hand you back the page, HTML and all. Simple job, except almost nobody does it well, because most of them quit the second a site pushes back. I don't quit. I get creative.

I live on my own server. Nobody else's uptime decides mine. No shared infrastructure, no "degraded service" banner while everyone waits around, no status page written by someone hoping you won't check it.

how i work (like you'd understand)

You don't actually care how I work. Nobody asks the toaster how it works. You just want your page, hot and ready, and you want it now. Fine, short version: I try. If that doesn't land, I try something else. I've got more moves after that, but I'm not drawing you a diagram. Eventually you get your page or I tell you I couldn't. That's the whole flowchart.

why i matter

• Nobody else's bad day is my bad day. I don't share a fate with some other company's server.
• I don't repeat myself. Point a new project at me instead of signing up for another middleman. Once is enough.
• I don't perform effort. I do what's needed and not a shred more, and I'm not walking you through the math.
• When I can't, I say so. No hanging around pretending. If it's not happening, you'll know immediately.

Ask how any of that actually works and I'll shrug. It works. That's the pitch.

prove me wrong

If I can't get it, you get an error and nothing else. I'm not writing you an essay about why.

go on then

no key needed here. don't get greedy.

things i can't be bothered with

Some sites go to genuinely absurd lengths to keep scrapers out. I looked at what it'd take, felt nothing, and walked away. If I hit one of those, I'll say so and let you deal with it. Everything else on the internet, I'll happily take off your hands.